Marriage in the United States has become so sad in and of itself. The statistics show that more and more people are getting divorced and of those who are still married, many are unhappy in their marriages. I have seen people here at BYU marry people they don't love, knowingly marry untrustworthy and dishonest partners, as well as marry simply because they want to fulfill their animalistic need for sexual intimacy. I won't even go into how I feel about the youth of the church haphazardly entering into sacred temple marriages, because honestly thats a whole nother volume in my encyclopedia of thoughts.
At church on Sunday the Neiswenders in our ward (who are also our neighbors) gave very good talks about friendship and fellowshipping. I really enjoyed hearing Haley reiterating what Bruce C. Hafen of the seventy said in 2002 in his talk entitled The Gospel and Romantic Love when he said that we should "be friends first and sweethearts second. University professor Lowell Bennion once said that relationships between young men and young women should be built like a pyramid. The base of the pyramid is friendship. And the ascending layers are built of things like time, understanding, respect, and restraint. Right at the top of the pyramid is a glittering little mystery called romance. Now, you don’t have to be very smart to know that a pyramid won’t stand up very long if you stand it on its point instead of its base. In other words, be friends first and sweethearts later, not the other way around. Otherwise, people who think they are sweethearts may discover they can’t be very good friends, and by then it may be too late."
If we want to protect marriage we need to start in our own homes looking inwardly rather than outwardly. I feel that more people would live more fulfilling and happy lives if we spent more time evaluating how we are doing in our lives, how we are treating our partner and how our marriages are doing as a whole. Thats how I want to protect my marriage, by staying best friends with my husband and not letting the world defile our love and devotion to each other. Does anyone need to vote on that? No.
Right now a hot topic in regards to marriage is California's Proposition 8. I am not one to get into great debates with people. I don't voice my political opinions much. This being said I have been very saddened by the recent publicity amongst the youth at BYU and in the church over Proposition 8. It saddens me to see families put at arms because certain members support Proposition 8 and others do not. I believe we all have a choice in this battle. I feel that those of us who do not live or vote in California have even less of a say on what is happening with Proposition 8.
I have felt somewhat awkward since hearing the churches stance on Proposition 8, I simply believed that they would not make a political stance on this issue. I understand the churches stance and I feel for the issue both ways, although I feel that we should not sit on the fence because its easy. I have heard a lot of things that seem less than true about why the church supports Proposition 8 so I did some research and now feel more confident in understanding why the Church supports it and knowing that some of the rumors I had heard were wrong. As citizens we have every right to make ourselves as knowledgeable about the issues as possible.
The church made its stance at the end of June. "The Church’s teachings and position on this moral issue are unequivocal. Marriage between a man and a woman is ordained of God, and the formation of families is central to the Creator’s plan for His children. Children are entitled to be born within this bond of marriage."
However it was nice to read that "Latter-day Saints are free to disagree with their church on the issue (Prop 8) without facing any sanction", said L. Whitney Clayton of the LDS Quorum of the Seventy. "We love them and bear them no ill will."
Literature written by Proposition 8 proponents are freely distributed in Mormon wards, giving the impression the church approves of these pamplets, but much of it is "misinformation," said Morris Thurston, an LDS attorney in Orange County. Thurston has circulated a point-by-point response to an anonymously authored document that has been widely disseminated by Mormons, "Six Consequences . . . If Proposition 8 Fails." Thurston argues that most of its arguments are either untrue or misleading. "The general church authorities I have spoken to have been understanding and compassionate," he said. "They counsel respect, civility and open mindedness toward those who disagree with the church's position."
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