C-sections

I stumbled across an article in attempts to find some peace about the emotions I have been having about my c-section. This article did bring some comfort to me in knowing that I'm not alone in my feelings.

"Having never experienced labor, I sometimes feel like a little girl eavesdropping on the grown-ups’ tales of childbirth." This is exactly how I feel. Listening to my friends exchange labor stories is sometimes hard, I still want to hear them but I feel like I didn't give birth, I don't hold the badge of "x" amount of hours in labor. I don't feel like I have a story to tell which may explain why its taken me so long to write down Ava's birth story.

"If I’ve learned anything in ten years of motherhood, it’s that the way our children are brought into the world means very little for how they live in the world. Nor do the intense hours in which we become mothers shape the months, years and decades of our actually being mothers." I pray that someday I will be able to find peace of mind about my c-section and also about not being able to breastfeed. "Let birth remind us that, with children, so little goes according to even the most well-drawn plan."

But when Ava smiles at me I feel nothing but love and none of this matters in the end :)

Ava's Birthday Photos

2 hours before she was born, me in my huge glory getting prepped... do I look scared or what?

Dan all ready to go!
Just before we went back...
Ava's 1st photo! (Technically her 3rd but you don't want to see the first two and probably don't want to see this one!)
Cleaning up our blue baby.
Dan got to cut her cord.
Our first family photo!
This is what it looks like after, crazy haired mom and beautiful little baby

March 15th

At this morning's appointment, we scheduled our c-section for March 15th! It feels a little strange to know when she will be coming if all goes as planned. But it will also be nice to have her that day because it's the first day of my Mom's spring break, so she will be able to be around that whole week :) It's a week before our due date though, so I get a couple more ultrasounds to make sure she is growing on track and doing well before they deliver her. Less than 4 months now!