Library Music Time

Bedtime with Ava

I adore this girl! I always find her sleeping in the most interesting ways... including this one, cuddling her ice water with her finger on her nose!

  Dan normally does bedtime with Ava but the past few nights I've been sneaking in and reading with them. These are Ava's 3 favorite books right now! She has them all memorized :) She knows what all the animals do in Cowboy pup, especially the ornery rattle snake. She even pretends to burn her finger on the camp fire at the end. She knows all her opposites and loves to tell us what is the opposite of what. She sings along to Pajama time "pajama jama jama PJ" It is the cutest thing. I love reading with Ava!

Saturday at Little Gym

26+ months of infertility

I wish more friends would simply ask how we are doing. I feel like there are lots of friends and family aware of what we are going through but very few that reach out and do these things. I appreciate the ones that do more than I could ever say, thank you from the bottom of my heart! I often feel like what we are going through is often ignored, not that I want to talk about it with friends and family constantly but its nice to know that we are not alone.  Even if you have never dealt with infertility, its comforting to know there are people who love and care about the struggles we have experienced. This is a loss in our life that we are trying to come to terms with daily.

It is really really hard for me seeing people everywhere having more children, children younger than Ava that are already big brothers or big sisters (or will be very soon). Its especially hard that people who have already gotten pregnant once and had their babies are getting pregnant again since we have been trying. Its hard to see little babies become big brothers or sisters right after their 1st or 2nd birthdays. I have lots of family and friends that fit in this category of having had another child since we've been trying, obviously the world doesn't stop getting pregnant because I can't. I love you and your kids but its sometimes a hard reminder of what we can't do. You can't change that, nor should you, just be understanding that it may be hard for me (some days are harder than others).

I am grateful for what I do have and I am trying to focus on this. Its easy to judge a mom with secondary infertility and say she should just be grateful for the child/children she has but its not that simple. There are lots and lots of hard days where I can be negative and sad. Please be patient with me in this aspect.

Book I ordered to read! Looking forward to its arrival.

Ava's quilt

 Ava's quilt is coming along :) I may rearrange the color order a little but other than that the next step is sew it!!

Snow Day

Countdown!

2/19/13

Ava and I went 'shopping' at Traverse Mountain outlets. We went right at 10 when they opened and there was NO one there! We loved it. Ava had fun walking around and looking at the windows full of clothes. We stopped by Gymboree to look at their Easter dresses. I had already ordered Ava's but I wanted to see which one she would pick out. When I asked her, this is the one she picked out :) and happens to be the dress I ordered for her already. She has great taste!

We then went to see Grama at work since she was in Colorado for the long weekend. Ava had asked to go to Grama's house daily while she was gone.

Later that afternoon we went to Grama's house and Ava played while I worked on this quilt. I have had the material for maybe 2 years now... I have been meaning to make Ava a quilt that entire time. I saw a chevron and white quilt with lots of different blocks like this and decided it would be a good pattern to use. Thank goodness for Kathy showing me the best way to do this quilt, I surely would have messed it up big time had I tried it on my own. I have a few changes I am going to make before I finally sew it together (and its missing the top half of it in this photo)

Princess Birthday

Even though we are forgoing a big party I still wanted to make Rapunzel invites for Ava's little dinner. They are super simple but Ava stood by me while I made them telling me over and over "Punzel! Punzel!"

4 more weeks till this girl is 3!

 

Words cannot explain how amazingly fast this last 3 years have gone! I feel literally like I blinked and my sweet little 7 pound baby grew up into this beautiful little girl with so much personality and so much love! She is the funniest little thing and she talks a mile a minute! These photos are so perfect at explaining Ava's personality. She does what she wants and most of the time that isn't posing for photos. But every so often I can catch one of her actually looking and smiling. She would much rather be moving non stop than to stop and take a photo.

She also completely and utterly adores little dolls. I've gotten her bigger versions of foofa and dora and she kinda thinks they are chopped liver. She would much rather have the beanie baby version of any doll any day. They are her "friends" and she loves them so much! She takes them everywhere and she makes them all talk to each other and have conversations. Its so cute.

I tried to take her dolls away in the above photo and of course that didn't go well. She started crying so I immediately gave her foofa back. She grabbed foofa and told her "I so sorry foofa, I sorry, I love you!" It was too cute and watching her hug her little doll with all her might was so sweet.

She is in her own little world in these photos. She just kept playing and playing and playing with not much regard to what I was doing. I couldn't get over how cute it was that she was walking with foofa. She just doesn't stop. I am so completely grateful for Ava and the joy she brings our life. She is the center of both Dan and I's universe and we adore her. She has made our family a family and I couldn't have dreamed up a sweeter daughter. In all my life I wanted a daughter and I feel so incredibly blessed to have Ava as mine. The greatest gift as of late is her growing ability to express love.

Valentines Day

Disney on Ice

This year Disney on Ice is coming the week before Ava's birthday. Not to mention it has her 2 favorite princess's in the show. We decided instead of doing a big party this year like we did last year, Ava and I would go to disney on ice :) and do a little party on her birthday. I am so excited!! I showed Ava the website and she asked to watch the 2 minute clip at least 15 times.

We have 3rd row seats and I know she will have a blast! As soon as we decided we were going I started to try and think of an outfit. Couldn't decide if I would have one made or attempt to make it myself. I searched online and found this fabric. Seemed like it was made for this show seeing as it had the same 3 princess's that are in the show.

I had my sister in law help me pick out the ruffle colors via iPhone and I love how it turned out. Bright and cheery and perfect for a 3 year old :) ill stick a white long sleeve shirt and some white tights underneath it for the show so shes not cold. So excited and cannot believe she is turning 3! She is turning into such a little girl :)

Tube Surgery take 2

Back in November we went into the ENT to find out that her tubes were just barely growing out of her ears, within a week she had a double ear infection. She has had probably 4 ear infections now since Thanksgiving, they just don't seem to stop. We took her off cows milk and that made a huge difference in her tear duct problems but not the ear infections.

After going rounds and rounds with different doctors trying to get surgery coordinated between the eye and ear doctor we finally gave up and went with our doctor in Orem again. I just couldn't make Ava suffer months more of ear infections while we waited.

Ava has had a cough the last 2 weeks (likely due to the air quality) so starting on Friday we have been doing abuterol asthma treatments to help her lungs clear up. They won't do surgery if she has an active cough or her lungs sound bad. We got our call yesterday afternoon that her time was 9:30. At first I was sad it wasn't earlier but then realized we could just let her sleep in as late as possible and then go straight to the hospital since she couldn't eat or drink after midnight.

Dan went to work and Kathy came and picked Ava and I up. We got the hospital right before 9:30 and waited in the lobby for maybe 30 minutes till they got us a room. It was the exact same room as last time :) There was a little boy in the bed we had last time that was already done with his surgery. He was very unhappy so that didn't help as they got Ava set up. She didn't want to have her oxygen monitor on or have to wear their hospital clothes.  We waited around for a long time. Thankfully I brought the ipad and she was able to watch Timmy Time and Dora while we waited and play with stickers.

At 11:01 they came and got her to take her back. I thought she would get upset but she did fine. The nurse came in to get her bed about 5 minutes later and I said to him "sorry if she's being really feisty" and his response was "oh no, she's totally relaxed and fine.." I was pretty surprised at that. They told us they would be back in 30 minutes and at 11:31 on the dot Dr. Heras came in to tell us the surgery went great and they were waking her up in recovery.

They wheeled her back to our room and when they brought her in I asked "is she asleep?" I was expecting screaming, crying, furious Ava like last time. She was kinda awake, kinda asleep. They moved her from her bed and into my arms and she passed back out! She was asleep for about 15 minutes when she started to stir.  She didn't like the IV in her hand but they told us they wouldn't take it out till she drank something. I promised them that she would drink as soon as it was out but she would fight them till they took it out.  They took it out and she finally had a drink and ate a Popsicle. 

By that point she was ready to leave! No real crying, no fusing (well some fussing) but she just wanted to GO! We got her dressed, asked if it were okay for her to leave and Ava walked herself right out of the hospital and climbed in the car. We were there for 3 hours exactly. I was so surprised it went so well.  As soon as we got home it was like nothing had ever happened! I'm so happy to have this surgery behind us again. We may need ear tubes again and possibly tonsil removal but I'm glad for today that she has tubes again and her adenoids gone!