Happy Engagement Anniversary... or Halloween

One year ago Dan tricked me into thinking he was staying at school all evening and I was so sad. I drove around after work with nothing to do and nowhere to go. I finally went back to my house and found my Daniel there with a dozen roses! He took me to Rock Canyon park and proposed along the path! I nervously laughed and of course as you all know said yes! It was so perfect, he was so sweet, he got down on one knee and he had the most beautiful ring in a beautiful box.

We have been married 4 months now and I am so blessed to have him in my life. We are still learning new things everyday and adjusting to all the new things that life throws at you when you are married. I am still trying to learn how to be a better wife and I know that will be a life long journey. I love my sweetheart and since we both aren't big on Halloween I am excited to celebrate our 1 year mark since our engagement by going to the movies tonight and having a nice night to ourselves!!

Sweeney Todd

Mary and I went tonight to see Sweeney Todd at the Castle Amphitheatre near the State Hospital in Provo. It was a really neat place, really beautiful with a great view and it was a perfect night for a good creepy play! I love Sweeney Todd the movie so I was a little worried that this play would disappoint me but it was AMAZING! They all had amazing voices and I loved that the characters did not interact with each other.

Pumpkins!

But not the kind you carve and make a mess with! I actually went to a relief society activity and I can't tell you how many years its been since I have been to one (or now that I think about it, if I have ever been to one!). It was fun to get to know some of the girls in our ward. I am still trying to learn names and meet people.

Green Fingers

Today I decided to do an art project that was on my 101 things to do list! I decided to do make a piece of art for the bathroom since we have such pretty greens in there but nothing on the walls!

Today I bought the wrong colors of green at the store... the ones I bought were bright and light but I mixed the greens with white, yellow, and black and came up with colors that matched our bathroom!
I have a problem... I paint over carpet... so far I have had no accidents.
This was the pattern I was basing it off of. I decided to not do the whole canvas with it and just do two parts on the canvas... you will see.
Dan was pretty excited about our new bathroom art!Ta Da!

101 things!

I have seen this on a few blogs and decided to do it for Dan and I. We also started it from our wedding day because we have had a list of things we have wanted to do once we were married since about a month before our wedding!

Start Date: Saturday June 28th, 2008
End Date: Saturday March 26th, 2011

Brittany and Dan = 1-39
Brittany = 40-89
Dan = 90-101

1. Get Married - Completed Saturday June 28th, 2008
2. Get Sealed in the temple - Completed Saturday June 27th, 2009
3. Stick to Weight Watchers for 1 year - Postponed till after Baby
4. Tube down Provo River - Completed Saturday August 9th, 2008
5. Have a baby!!! - March 2010
6. Take a vacation to the beach
7. Visit each of Dan's Siblings (Idaho - Done May 1-3rd 2009, Texas and Washington)
8. Watch all four sessions of conference!
9. Graduate from BYU and Neumont - Neumont June 2009, Britt postponed Dec 2009
10. Go Camping
11. Buy a House
12. Put money from each pay check into our savings account for 6 months without taking any money out
13. Have couples prayer and scripture study daily for 3 months
14. Take Temple Prep Class - Completed January 2009
15. Get our Endowments Out - Completed Saturday April 25th, 2009 Draper Utah
16. Send out Family Christmas Cards
17. Visit 5 temples (Draper, Provo, Rexburg, Timp & Salt Lake) Complete May 2009
18. Go to a concert
19. Don't eat out for 1 month/Make dinner at home for 1 month!
20. Recycle our aluminum cans for 2 months - Completed Wednesday December 24th, 2008
21. Go hit a bucket of balls at a driving range - Completed Friday October 24th, 2008
22. Hang out with 5 different Couples - Complete (Hubners, Cranes, Fillmores, Deshazers, Hunsakers, Jones)
23. Get all of our tax information together from all jobs in 2008 (Acumen, BYU, Smokehouse, Acentra, Manpower and Vision Security) and file taxes for 2008 - Completed February 15th, 2009
24. Get a puppy - Complete June 20, 2009
25. Play Tennis together
26. Play Basket Ball together
27. Visit Grandpa Rex's grave at the Salt Lake Cemetery in Utah
28. Visit my sister Allison's grave at the Green Acres Cemetery in Scottsdale, Arizona
29. Make Sunday dinner for Dan's Parents - Completed 1st Sunday June 2009
30. Take a road trip to Las Vegas – Planned for Thanksgiving 2009
31. Take Carley and Chainey out for a fun day trip - Completed Saturday December 27th, 2008 (plan another one!)
32. Go to a Kempton Family Party
33. Speak in Sacrament Meeting
34. Buy nicer couches for the living room
35. Make copies of each of our Patriarchal blessings for each of our scriptures (get new scriptures!)
36. Have family pictures taken
37. Drive the Alpine Loop
38. Get our wedding rings engraved
39. Hike the Y - Completed Saturday October 25th, 2008
40. Be healthy enough to stop taking Pseudotumor Medicine (down to 250mg as of May 2009!!)
41. No longer test positive for insulin resistance (Insulin resistance went down to Moderate Nov 19th, 2008!)
42. Write a wedding diary - Completed Monday August 4th, 2008
43. Don't use my credit card for 1 month - Completed Friday December 4th, 2008
44. Run a 5k Again
45. Run a half marathon
46. Get an internship and finish all paperwork before I start it - Completed Thursday December 18th, 2008
47. Finish internship - Completed April 14th, 2009
48. Finish all of my online classes - just need to finish Physical Science by Dec 2009
49. Finish a quilt - Completed 2 baby quilts Saturday November 29th, 2008
50. Take a Joann's Sewing Class - Completed July 2009
51. Use my new sewing machine to make something for my Mom
52. Register for Graduation - Completed Wednesday January 7th, 2009
53. Go to the dentist to get my back molar fixed as well as make a plan for what to do about 2 missing teeth - Completed March 2009 (still need crown)
54. Renew my CPR and First Aid Certification
55. Take the Ches Exam
56. Become a CNA
57. Go to Nursing School
58. Finish reading the Book of Mormon
59. Compile College journal entries (including blog posts)
60. Give testimony in church
61. Read 5 novels that have nothing to do with school
62. Create a new set of paintings for our bedroom or bathroom (like the ones in the kitchen) - Completed Tuesday October 28th, 2008
63. Go to a play - Completed Thursday October 30th, 2008
64. Vote in the presidential elections - Completed Sunday October 12th, 2008
65. Get A's in most of my classes for Fall 2008 - Completed Tuesday December 30th, 2008 (Only 1 B+)
66. Write at least one Public Health related blog entry each month for a year
67. Do the dishes for 1 month straight (poor Dan always does them)
68. Go to a relief society activity - Completed Wednesday October 29th, 2008
69. Submit a letter to the editor (Daily Universe)
70. Perfect 5 hymns on my violin (learn because I have been given much)
71. Learn how to sing and play the guitar at the same time
72. Write down life stories and lessons learned
73. Make a skirt with a cute peek-a-boo underskirt
74. Hang up all the pictures in our apartment to complete our home - Completed Saturday October 18th, 2008
75. Finish my engagement photo/wedding guest book/wedding photo scrapbook - Finished Friday October 31st, 2008 (just need to print out wedding diary to put in the back of the scrapbook!)
76. Get handbooks and things ready for the Volunteer Coordinating and Accessible Book Creation programs at the University Accessibility Center before I leave
77. Try 10 new recipes out of our healthy cookbooks in just 1 month
78. Sign up for the Gerontology Minor - Completed Monday September 15th, 2008
79. Send a secret into Post Secret
80. Get a rear tires and find out what is wrong with alignment - Finished Friday January 30th, 2009 (Keep getting them rotated at Big O every 3000!)
81. Make a binder for appliance manuals, receipts and important documents – Completed Document File Box made in October 2009
82. Make treats for the neighbors using my Kitchenaid Mixer
83. Organize the files on all of our computers and put them on an external hard drive
84. Volunteer somewhere new
85. Buy a Bob Boyd photograph of the temple we get sealed in
86. Take a photography and an art class somewhere
87. Buy a plant and keep it alive
88. Work in a hospital
89. Get a professional massage
90. Develop a Dan Website - Started November 2008
91. Make a video game for Xbox 360
92. Write an application for android (Google G1 phone) - Started October 2008
93. Receive the Melkezidek Priesthood - Completed Sunday December 14th, 2008
94. Invest some money - Completed March 11th 2009
95. Get a full time job after graduation - Completed April 10th 2009 (accepted SpectraSoft offer)
96. Get good grade car insurance - Completed Saturday October 18th, 2008
97. Suprise Brittany with Flowers - Completed Tuesday October 7th, 2008
98. Take a motorcycle class and get motorcycle license
99. Buy a new car
100. Get Lasik-eye Surgery
101. Start paying back student loans – Started paying back in July 2009

Turn Cans into Keys

For my Health 438 course this semester we are doing a social marketing project with Habitat for Humanities in regards to recycling in Provo. We are trying to raise awareness of the needs for recycling in the communities around BYU as well as help Habitat for Humanities raise money to build new homes for families in our community!

Protecting Marriage?

Marriage in the United States has become so sad in and of itself. The statistics show that more and more people are getting divorced and of those who are still married, many are unhappy in their marriages. I have seen people here at BYU marry people they don't love, knowingly marry untrustworthy and dishonest partners, as well as marry simply because they want to fulfill their animalistic need for sexual intimacy. I won't even go into how I feel about the youth of the church haphazardly entering into sacred temple marriages, because honestly thats a whole nother volume in my encyclopedia of thoughts.

At church on Sunday the Neiswenders in our ward (who are also our neighbors) gave very good talks about friendship and fellowshipping. I really enjoyed hearing Haley reiterating what Bruce C. Hafen of the seventy said in 2002 in his talk entitled The Gospel and Romantic Love when he said that we should "be friends first and sweethearts second. University professor Lowell Bennion once said that relationships between young men and young women should be built like a pyramid. The base of the pyramid is friendship. And the ascending layers are built of things like time, understanding, respect, and restraint. Right at the top of the pyramid is a glittering little mystery called romance. Now, you don’t have to be very smart to know that a pyramid won’t stand up very long if you stand it on its point instead of its base. In other words, be friends first and sweethearts later, not the other way around. Otherwise, people who think they are sweethearts may discover they can’t be very good friends, and by then it may be too late."

If we want to protect marriage we need to start in our own homes looking inwardly rather than outwardly. I feel that more people would live more fulfilling and happy lives if we spent more time evaluating how we are doing in our lives, how we are treating our partner and how our marriages are doing as a whole. Thats how I want to protect my marriage, by staying best friends with my husband and not letting the world defile our love and devotion to each other. Does anyone need to vote on that? No.

Right now a hot topic in regards to marriage is California's Proposition 8. I am not one to get into great debates with people. I don't voice my political opinions much. This being said I have been very saddened by the recent publicity amongst the youth at BYU and in the church over Proposition 8. It saddens me to see families put at arms because certain members support Proposition 8 and others do not. I believe we all have a choice in this battle. I feel that those of us who do not live or vote in California have even less of a say on what is happening with Proposition 8.

I have felt somewhat awkward since hearing the churches stance on Proposition 8, I simply believed that they would not make a political stance on this issue. I understand the churches stance and I feel for the issue both ways, although I feel that we should not sit on the fence because its easy. I have heard a lot of things that seem less than true about why the church supports Proposition 8 so I did some research and now feel more confident in understanding why the Church supports it and knowing that some of the rumors I had heard were wrong. As citizens we have every right to make ourselves as knowledgeable about the issues as possible.

The church made its stance at the end of June. "The Church’s teachings and position on this moral issue are unequivocal. Marriage between a man and a woman is ordained of God, and the formation of families is central to the Creator’s plan for His children. Children are entitled to be born within this bond of marriage."

However it was nice to read that "Latter-day Saints are free to disagree with their church on the issue (Prop 8) without facing any sanction", said L. Whitney Clayton of the LDS Quorum of the Seventy. "We love them and bear them no ill will."

Literature written by Proposition 8 proponents are freely distributed in Mormon wards, giving the impression the church approves of these pamplets, but much of it is "misinformation," said Morris Thurston, an LDS attorney in Orange County. Thurston has circulated a point-by-point response to an anonymously authored document that has been widely disseminated by Mormons, "Six Consequences . . . If Proposition 8 Fails." Thurston argues that most of its arguments are either untrue or misleading. "The general church authorities I have spoken to have been understanding and compassionate," he said. "They counsel respect, civility and open mindedness toward those who disagree with the church's position."

Mormons for Marriage

Stuart Matis

Stuart Matis 2

Sunday at the Calkins

Hiking the Y

I hiked the Y today with two of my fantastic friends, Cynthia and Mary! I couldn't believe they talked be into going... They had never gone and I had gone once a year a half ago. I had so much more fun this time with these girls, I wanted to give up so often but they were so encouraging and we all made it up alive! We had an amazing view and could even see the full foot ball stadium!

Golfin Calkins

Did you know Dan can Golf?!? Neither did I! He even has a golf glove... uh!I was far more concerned with taking pictures than golfing!

My new favorite Breakfast!!! So yummy that I am actually eating Breakfast

I need a Break before I Break

This is not my week!

When all the little things in life seem to go wrong... what are we to do? I feel like throwing big massive angry fits of rage instead of dealing with them like an adult this week.

Neumont University

For those of you that don't know, Dan attends a school called Neumont University. It is home to lost of computer nerds who have recently graduated high school early because they are so stinking smart. They only study Computer Science at Neumont and it is an accelerated program that allows the students to graduate with their Bachelors in approximately 2 years of year round schooling. Dan is 3 days into his 6th semester their and only has 2 more left! We look forward to him graduating this June!!!

Dan sent me this link to his University Forum and showed me an idea that he had posted!

"So if you drive around town sometime you will see a number of different license plates for the state of Utah. Some of the Neumont students wouldn't care, but I think that Neumont should get their own license plate. There are many different collegiate license plates but it would be sweet if we could get a Neumont plate."I like the Utah plate... too bad I don't want to stay in Utah (hahaha) because it would be fun to have a Neumont plate! Hopefully Dan doesn't mind me showing him off on my blog.

Relationship Violence can happen even at BYU

This semester in my Womens Health Issues class our group is researching Domestic Violence at BYU. In speaking with different people just in our class it was evident that this is a re-occurring problem at our campus even though it is not often talked about. Wymount Terrace on its own gets the BYU police called most often for domestic violence. The masters student that assists our class was telling us that in the two and a half years her husband and her have lived their they have had to call the police over 2 dozen times on different neighbors. 2 times alone last week for one couple.

Many times the police show up and offer the women a safe place to go and they offer the man the chance to go with them to the police station. After so many times the man no longer gets the choice to go, they get escorted in hand cuffs to the station.

At BYU Domestic Violence is not restricted to those whose who have made sacred vows to one another. Many girls have abusive boyfriends (or just men in their lives), that may be it physically or emotionally abusive to them and some may not even realize that it is happening to them. Having lived through this myself in both aspects of physical and emotional violence from a previous boyfriend I understand the need for advocacy in this area especially amongst the girls here at BYU.

Domestic Violence:

Abuse is a means to gain power and control. A behavior is abusive if it is hurtful, occurs in a pattern, and does not stop. Domestic violence is the single most common source of injury to women. Physical violence is estimated to occur in 4 to 6 million intimate relationships each year in the United States.

“How tragic and utterly disgusting a phenomenon is wife abuse. Any man in this Church who abuses his wife, who demeans her, who insults her, who exercises unrighteous dominion over her is unworthy to hold the priesthood. Though he may have been ordained, the heavens will withdraw, the Spirit of the Lord will be grieved, and it will be amen to the authority of the priesthood of that man.” President Gordon B. Hinckley

For more information visit BYU's Women Services.

Other Resources:
Where Home isn't a Haven by Kent Harrison
Coping with the aftermath of Abuse by Jane Lawson
Healing from abuse through the power of the Atonement by Daniel Judd
Not to People Like Us by Susan Weitzman
To Heal the Shattering Consequences of Abuse by Richard G. Scott
Church Program Helps Victims of Domestic Violence
Utah Dating Violence Task Force

Who to call for help:
Women's Services and Resources 422-4887
BYU Police 422-2222
Center for Women & Children in Crisis/Rape Crisis Center 377-5500
National 24-hour Hotline 1-800-799-SAFE

Love One Another

I was really touched by a talk I heard back in September but now I can't find it anywhere online, so I am recounting my notes and thoughts. I just wish I could read it again. However in googling it I found a women who blogged about it so well and described some of the same emotions that I felt that it was the best I could come to actually finding the publication of the talk.

Courtney wrote what follows:

Elder Jensen spoke of the many "different" people in the church. He explained how there is a certain culture surrounding the gospel (naturally), and how many people do not fit in to this particular mold. The classic (but true, all the same) examples of being divorced, single, widowed make people feel as though they don't belong, but also those who struggle with depression or eating disorders or those who have loved ones who are going through difficult times. Those who are minorities or those who have physical disabilities. As he listed all these people, I started to wonder how anyone feels like they belong in this culture. And that was one of his biggest points. He said, "everyone is a lost sheep. everyone has their failings, and everyone has their differences."

More often than not, I do not feel like I belong at church. I am not naturally out-going, and I rarely feel like I have people to talk to at church. Particularly now that we are in a new ward, I wonder if we will ever find our place. But I loved how Elder Jensen spoke about how it was our duty to include everyone. I've come to realize over the past couple years that there are very few people who don't need new friends. It's still hard for me to reach out to anyone, but realizing that has helped me a little bit.

Elder Jensen opened his talk by speaking about his younger brother, who had brain damage due to birth complications. The brother was often the brunt of much ridicule as a boy, and I felt so much shock at how people feel free to mock those with obvious disabilities. Then I read this post at By Common Consent today and thought the same thing. It scares me to have kids. I don't want them to be made fun of, but I'm also terrified that they will make fun of other kids.

One of the most important things I want-- need-- to teach my children is true compassion and understanding of others' feelings. Hopefully by making this a priority they won't make fun of other kids and when they are adults, they will reach out to those in need (well, I hope they do both things regardless of being a child or an adult).

I'm not sure where the church culture comes from that makes others feel alienated. I feel like I know more people who don't fit the perfect mold than those who do, but perhaps that's because I gravitate towards normal, real people. :)

I was very happy to find this blog post because it very much reflected how I feel. I work closely with people with disabilities as well have close family members who are disabled. I think of my cousin Chainey, who had Spina Bifida, when he was born. To think that anyone could ever tease him because he walks with a walker or sometimes uses a wheel chair kills me. I want to protect him but I know he is a strong boy. I also, like Courtney, want to teach my children (when I have children) to be accepting and love others.

I have felt very awkward before in wards and currently do. Its getting a little better but I still feel like the "special guest" that sticks out in the group like a sore thumb. For the first 3 months of being in our ward, we would only attend sacrament meeting. 3 weeks ago we started to attend all of our meetings and my first Sunday in Relief Society they introduced me as the "special guest" even though I had been in the ward for 3 months and they had already introduced all the new people and did the announcements and sang the opening song. I am sure they meant well but I just felt out of place.

I know most of them know that my husband and I were not married in the temple and most probably (more than I would like) know about our previous activity in the church, to me I feel out of place and awkward somewhat because of this. I am trying to be more outgoing in our ward, I even agreed to meet at 8:20 tonight to do my visiting teaching (my partner is the relief society president) and I signed up to do the October Craft on the 29th.

I know the church is true... the people don't always have me in fits of joy to go to activities but I know the simple fact that since Dan and I have centered our life on a common goal of working towards being better people we have been blessed in all aspects of our lifes. Heavenly Father blesses us and I can feel his love. I have always been very hard on myself and find that I feel guilty about most things I do and feel like their is no way Heavenly Father could love me.

This is the first time in my life that I feel like I have made the right decisions in working with our bishop and working towards our goal to be sealed together forever and that what we chose to do was right for us and we will be blessed. As often as I have seen people rush into marriage or dishonestly go through the temple I am glad we have waited and the joy of our sealing and our marriage has been so better because of this.

Wedding Photos!

Album 1
Album 2

I couldn't have asked for more perfect beautiful pictures to remember our FABULOUS day. I have a shrine of them at work and I adore staring at my Daniels face as much as possible! haha I am a true dork. I posted these because I realized I had deleted my album post... Its more for my sake than anyone else... This blog is like a journal for me... I'm even more of a dork.

Life's blessings!

Dan came home this past week with a bouquet of daisies and was so cute in having worked on this slide show of 101 reasons why he loves me. It was so cute and made me bawl. He is adorable. It was also cute idea of him to do since we had been married 101 days... Cheesy, maybe but I absolutely adore him for the things he does for me!My good friend Kate Brady had her baby shower yesterday it was so much fun! Her baby boy, Archie Bernard Brady, is due November 4th!

Michelle, Me, Kate (and Archie), Jeanine & Sarah

These girls were my roommates when I was 19! We had so much fun and I love each and every time I get to hang out with them. I was there for 6 hours and it went by so fast! Archie will be the first baby born to our little group! We are all so excited!

Today we had a great morning meeting with our bishop. He is such a blessing in our lives and so sweet to us both. We are so excited for events to come and we're thrilled to hear that what we are working towards is coming sooner than we ever thought! We are looking forward to the end of the year even more and are just so excited for all the great things to come! In 3 months we will both have finished another semester and be 6 months away from graduation! We will also get to go home to Arizona for Christmas!

News Flash

I am overweight. I have struggled with my weight almost my entire life. I remember feeling fat in kindergarten, your average say 6 year old doesn't not (should not) come up with this idea on their own and I don't remember classmates telling me that I was fat so I pretty much know the source... Anyway I look back and I was a normal 6 year old, just tall. Whatever, I am far older than 6 and the self esteem body issue damage has been done and all I can do is work through how I feel.

Time goes by. I get to be a freshman in high school, I am doing okay, I am still overweight but in the grand scheme of things I was relatively normal for an adult. Then my parents go through their divorce. I get really angry and depressed and food became a comfort. I gained a lot of weight in high school and I wish I could go back to those days and reorganize my behavior and unhealthy eating habits. But regrets die hard and we move on, right?

I get to college. Now I am significantly overweight. I go through my freshman year and finish and realize I hate being overweight. I start doing weight watchers and lose a lot of weight, yet I become obsessive about it and it didn't end up being the healthiest thing for me at that time in my life. I was convinced my life would be so much better if I was thin. I was wrong. It did make me susceptible to the male audience that I had never received attention from and little did I know at the time most guys that I met in Provo did not want to get to know me for my mind.

So heart break, heart break, abusive relationships, heart break, etc occur.

Then I get sick... I get so awesomely sick that I can't get out of bed or go to school for that semester. I get so sick that I can't run which was my life line to staying thin at that time. I pick myself up have some more abuse and heart break and then I meet Dan. Dan accepted me for the "man hating basket case" that I was at the time. He saw me and wanted to know me. I am so thankful for him. He sees me through my Pseudotumor Cerebri and then is my husband when I find out about my insulin resistance.

Now I am at the state where I have had 3 significant health issues in the past year and a half and have gained back most of the weight I lost originally. I need to lose weight in order to be a healthy person but now I realize I don't need to lose weight to be accepted. I think about my future and my children and I now want to change for completely different reasons.
I am a public health major. I have a great worth of knowledge about what it takes for people to live long lives and be healthy. I know I am one of the only overweight people in my classes but still I come everyday and talk about lowering peoples risk for diabetes and childhood obesity levels. I think to myself... "will I ever be a marketable candidate for a position if I cannot portray myself as living what I preach?"

Well by the demands of my doctor and her threats on my future I am back on healthy regime. I don't mind it, I actually quite prefer it, however sometimes I fear my obsessive competitive attitude will manifest in an unhealthy way. Dan has me in check however.

I miss running. I used to run, a lot. I used to run all over Provo and I miss that dearly. I am not working into getting into the perfect pair of jeans, I am not looking to set off on the runways of New York or Paris or even Provo.... I am looking to run again, because when I ran I felt so free.
This may be of interest to absolutely no one, but these are the things I don't tell people. These are the things I hide away from peers and friends. Well guess what, I'm not hiding anymore.